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heart break

you look at me silently and smile. i can taste the echo from the words you didn’t say. i turn around and walk away, feeling your eyes digging a hole through my skull. my legs are lead and my senses are on red alert. i hear my pulse hammering in my toes, screaming for me to reverse reverse reverse. i ignore it, and it just gets worse. The insides of my cheeks fill with blood. I walk into the subway and swipe my card. The train arrives promptly, for once. I sit down and collapse, my chest hammering away. A bottle tips over, reminiscent of the strange sound hearts make when they break. 


Thought of the day!

Cuddling is the besttttttt

This is what it feels like

Have you ever wanted to look at someone and just keep looking? Look at them until they looked back, and have an unabashed staring contest? Your eyes challenge theirs and you dare them to look away…but they can’t because your gaze has handcuffed their eyeballs in a merciless hold. I want to capture someone like this and keep them my prisoner. Read into their soul until I can write their autobiography. Unveil their secrets one by one - every crime, transgression, and guilty pleasure. I want to burn every line of their jaw and muted scar on their body into my retinas so I can mold a sculpture of them blindfolded. I want no space in between where I end and they begin.


are the worst. the worst. the worst.


you’re gonna miss me when i’m gone

i’ve wanted to write this for a while, but i just didn’t know how to.

i’m angry. i am so angry. i hate what you did to me. i hate that you used me. i hate that you abused me. and before you even deny it, yes you fucking did. you took my emotions and you trampled on them. you took my heart and you shattered it. you took my love and you left me with nothing. you ruined me. i hate you. i really fucking hate you. i don’t normally curse this much, but you deserve all of the worst words with the deepest sincerity. go rot in hell. i hope you burn. if i were trying to be a  grownup about it, i’d say something like, this experience has made me stronger, or that this pain has shown me what real life is about. but i can’t say that now because nothing about what you inflicted on me was deserved. i didn’t deserve it. i was good to you. i was so good to you. and you wrecked me.

so i hope you die. and i hope you get what’s coming to you. you and that stupid bitchass of a wife too. both of you were meant for one another. one evil person SHOULD be with another. you two are the worst human beings.

p.s. go suck a dick and choke on it, you hypocritical asshole